Well it was my little girls first day of playgroup today. I've been mentally preparing myself for this since she was born, and am still not quite ready.
We started the day with me awake stupidly early and watching some crap on tv, then my little darling arrived at my bedside, and we had girly snuggles and cuddles and watched childrens tv until it was time to get up and get dressed.
First of all the little sparkly pink trousers I chose for her to wear appear to now be two inches too short, so we had to change them for some jeans, which were also verging on being too short. So not only am I having to come to terms with the fact my little girl is going to playgroup - I am also having to deal with the fact that she is finally growing into clothes that are appropriate to her age. Some of the labels in her trousers are for age 12-18 months, and at just over 3 years old that makes her quite tiny.
Next we had to get through breakfast, she ate a good breakfast, as did her brother, and then I did her hair back in a ponytail and took some photos of her all ready for her first day.
Time seemed to steam along, as we were soon walking up the hills to take her brother to school, and she was declaring that she was a big girl now, and so walked 2 feet ahead of us almost all the way to school.
We dropped her brother at school - he went in beautifully and gave her a big hug and wished her luck for her first day at playgroup. I could feel tears welling already at this point, then I remembered that stupid Mummy had forgotten her piece of fruit.
So we wandered up to the co-op and she chose a couple of mandarin oranges to take with her. This was a good task, as we needed to kill a little time before we got to playgroup - as there is nothing worse than standing outside playgroup waiting for them to open the doors.
On the way we held hands, and I gulped back tears as she chatted in her little monkey way. She told me she felt a little bit sad, and I gulped back the tears harder than ever, and told her it was normal to feel that way.
She moaned that it was hard work walking to playgroup, and it is hard work, we had worn ourselves out on the first lot of hills!
When we arrived we had a short wait, and then the doors opened and the other children started wandering in, my lovely little girl was desperate to get in and get going, and was tugging at my reluctant hand. I wanted to run away and take her back home where we could hide away from the world, but I knew deep in my heart that you have to go through these things.
She is such a lovely natured child, and she was smiling and waving at a little girl who was crying and upset about going in to playgroup. Unfazed by her tears she just did what she could to try and cheer the unknown little girl up.
We signed her in, and handed in her fruit and passed over the reams of paper work that accompanies a child starting at playgroup.
She looked around the room with a big beaming smile - she was finally here!
I asked her what she wanted to do first, pointing out all the quiet activities, but she jumped right in and wanted to go with the rough and tumble of the wooden slide.
I asked her if she was ok if I left, and she said she was. I stood redundant for a moment or two until she turned to me and said 'Go on then go!' She was ready for me to remove myself, and I was ready to as the tears I had been gulping back since daybreak were starting to break free - and I did not want her to see them!
I walked out and phoned my lovely husband, and sobbed most of the way home into my phone.
I am so proud of her confidence, and so happy she was happy for me to go, but my baby has started playgroup, and I am sad.
I kept myself busy all morning, ironing, and drinking tea, and returned to collect her with my Mum.
We walked in and she saw me and shouted 'Mummy Mummy!' her big beaming smile and she ran towards me, flung her arms round my neck and hugged me tight, she then hugged her Grandma and told us she had a great time. She collected her picture she had made, and we walked out hand in hand. One of the ladies said what a good little girl she is and how they hardly knew they had her there, which really didn't surprise me at all. She is a good little girl.
In the car she told me she had missed me but had not been scared. I told her I had missed her too, and started the job of holding back the tears again.
I did well I held back the tears till she fell asleep, and now they pour.
The most stupid thing is I would have been at work anyway, but knowing she was doing something new and making her own little life away from me just makes me cry.
I am so proud of her, and so pleased and so happy that she had a good day, and she is so excited about going again tomorrow. What a clever little thing she is.
Tuesday, 7 September 2010
Saturday, 28 August 2010
Is that the time already?
I have a tummy full of ham, cheese and red jalapeno rolls and also a 24 week pregnant bump. Where has the time gone?
This is my best pregnancy out of the three so far, My lovely oldest son was nightmare pregnancy, I could barely stay awake most of the time, I couldn't eat much, was sick a lot, and generally felt terrible. My pregnancy with my daughter was not as bad as with my eldest, had more energy, but then I had to, being a Mummy to an energetic 2 year old at the time. But this time has to beat even that time, we had a few health worries with my daughter, and I spent the second half of the pregnancy worried sick and wishing the time away so we could meet her and find her to be beautiful and perfect - which of course she was and still is.
Everything so far has run fairly smoothy, and am quite enjoying my bump, but he (yes we found out he is a boy) does kick me really hard and it actually hurts sometimes! Maybe a future footballer?
My lovely husband is on call this weekend for work, he didn't get home till late last night, he was out early this morning for work, and has just returned home at 1.30 this afternoon, he walked in the door with 2 seperate mobile phones ringing, looking frazzled and quite frankly pissed off.
So that is our bank holiday weekend then, I'll see him occasionally between phone calls, and spend most of the time seperating the children from fights - although to be fair, they have been great so far today.
We were going to see Toy Story 3 at the cinema, in 3D this afternoon, but I am not sure that is going to happen now. This makes me sad as I have wanted to see it since it came out in the cinema 6 weeks ago, and the children would rather like to see it as well. Its the last weekend before my eldest returns to school after his summer holiday, which has flown past us.
We did him proud though between us and the grandparents, he has seen rescued horses at a sanctuary, been on piers and won teddies, seen steam trains, and spent time on the beach, he had a week in France, and visited the hell that is Disneyland, a huge french palace, a traditional french market and a tiny village where all the shops were too posh for us to go into! He has tasted French sausages, French Macdonalds, we were in the Brie region and so he sampled brie, and other cheeses, meats and fantastic bread and pastries.
Time is ticking on, and now my family is back in the same house again, I should go and spend time with them. (and on the subject of time, my eldest son is learning to tell the time, and I am enjoying the updates!)
This is my best pregnancy out of the three so far, My lovely oldest son was nightmare pregnancy, I could barely stay awake most of the time, I couldn't eat much, was sick a lot, and generally felt terrible. My pregnancy with my daughter was not as bad as with my eldest, had more energy, but then I had to, being a Mummy to an energetic 2 year old at the time. But this time has to beat even that time, we had a few health worries with my daughter, and I spent the second half of the pregnancy worried sick and wishing the time away so we could meet her and find her to be beautiful and perfect - which of course she was and still is.
Everything so far has run fairly smoothy, and am quite enjoying my bump, but he (yes we found out he is a boy) does kick me really hard and it actually hurts sometimes! Maybe a future footballer?
My lovely husband is on call this weekend for work, he didn't get home till late last night, he was out early this morning for work, and has just returned home at 1.30 this afternoon, he walked in the door with 2 seperate mobile phones ringing, looking frazzled and quite frankly pissed off.
So that is our bank holiday weekend then, I'll see him occasionally between phone calls, and spend most of the time seperating the children from fights - although to be fair, they have been great so far today.
We were going to see Toy Story 3 at the cinema, in 3D this afternoon, but I am not sure that is going to happen now. This makes me sad as I have wanted to see it since it came out in the cinema 6 weeks ago, and the children would rather like to see it as well. Its the last weekend before my eldest returns to school after his summer holiday, which has flown past us.
We did him proud though between us and the grandparents, he has seen rescued horses at a sanctuary, been on piers and won teddies, seen steam trains, and spent time on the beach, he had a week in France, and visited the hell that is Disneyland, a huge french palace, a traditional french market and a tiny village where all the shops were too posh for us to go into! He has tasted French sausages, French Macdonalds, we were in the Brie region and so he sampled brie, and other cheeses, meats and fantastic bread and pastries.
Time is ticking on, and now my family is back in the same house again, I should go and spend time with them. (and on the subject of time, my eldest son is learning to tell the time, and I am enjoying the updates!)
Wednesday, 28 July 2010
Tesco Value Range
You've got to love it.
They make jaffa cakes - really very nice jaffa cakes - they come in their plain packaging, white box blue stripes - you've all seen it before. But the thing I love most about Tesco Value Jaffa Cakes is they don't contain milk which means my delightful but lactose intolerant little girl can munch on them too - till her hearts content, till she has orange splatty bits coming out of her ears in fact!
I always want to do a little leap when I find something ordinary that she can eat too. She has her dairy free chocolate buttons, and her soya spread, her lacto-free milk and even special cheese, but when she can just sit with us and have ordinary food that we can all eat it makes me feel so happy.
She will ask if she can have something, and sometimes if someone offers her something she asks first if it has milk in it, because she knows it makes her have a sore tummy.
It breaks my heart and also makes me beam with pride because I feel so sad that she has to check before she eats things, but I am so proud that she understands at a three year olds level that she can't have some things, and she is clever enough to ask before she ploughs into something she may not be able to have.
Tesco value rich tea biscuits don't have milk in either - but rich tea biscuits are pretty pants anyway!
They make jaffa cakes - really very nice jaffa cakes - they come in their plain packaging, white box blue stripes - you've all seen it before. But the thing I love most about Tesco Value Jaffa Cakes is they don't contain milk which means my delightful but lactose intolerant little girl can munch on them too - till her hearts content, till she has orange splatty bits coming out of her ears in fact!
I always want to do a little leap when I find something ordinary that she can eat too. She has her dairy free chocolate buttons, and her soya spread, her lacto-free milk and even special cheese, but when she can just sit with us and have ordinary food that we can all eat it makes me feel so happy.
She will ask if she can have something, and sometimes if someone offers her something she asks first if it has milk in it, because she knows it makes her have a sore tummy.
It breaks my heart and also makes me beam with pride because I feel so sad that she has to check before she eats things, but I am so proud that she understands at a three year olds level that she can't have some things, and she is clever enough to ask before she ploughs into something she may not be able to have.
Tesco value rich tea biscuits don't have milk in either - but rich tea biscuits are pretty pants anyway!
Wednesday, 14 July 2010
Remembering Fondly
I remember the feeling very well, if I could bottle it and sell it I would be a billionaire, that feeling you get at the start of your six week summer holidays when you are a child.
You don't get that same feeling the year you leave school because there is uncertainty and decisions to be made that you will possibly regret for the rest of your life.
I remember the pure joy, the knowing that early mornings will be reserved for fun days out, the realisation that your school uniform will hang in your wardrobe getting dusty, the fact you can choose whatever you want to wear, what time you will get up, and you have the wonder of a morning full of childrens tv.
Although now I suppose that isn't one of the points that lure children into the joy of summer holidays - my children have tv on tap from the moment they wake to the moment they sleep if required, and its even there on those occasions that they have emptied their stomach contents all over their bed, and need a distraction from the sicky feeling that still remains in the middle of the night.
I have never ever had that feeling since I was approx fourteen years old, and I miss it, and I know I shall probably never ever have that feeling again.
What I do hope is that the children will get that lovely feeling, my little boy is counting down to his first six week holiday from school, and for months has been wanting to know how much longer?! This morning he welcomed me warmly when he woke up, with a big kiss and a lovely hug that only he knows how to deliver - he announced to us that he was really looking forward to school today, and he wished he could go there right now (it was 7am) I asked him why, and he told me because he has so much fun there.
I am so glad he is enjoying school, but I do wish he had discovered it wasn't that bad 6 months ago, instead of waiting till the week before he breaks up for summer!
You don't get that same feeling the year you leave school because there is uncertainty and decisions to be made that you will possibly regret for the rest of your life.
I remember the pure joy, the knowing that early mornings will be reserved for fun days out, the realisation that your school uniform will hang in your wardrobe getting dusty, the fact you can choose whatever you want to wear, what time you will get up, and you have the wonder of a morning full of childrens tv.
Although now I suppose that isn't one of the points that lure children into the joy of summer holidays - my children have tv on tap from the moment they wake to the moment they sleep if required, and its even there on those occasions that they have emptied their stomach contents all over their bed, and need a distraction from the sicky feeling that still remains in the middle of the night.
I have never ever had that feeling since I was approx fourteen years old, and I miss it, and I know I shall probably never ever have that feeling again.
What I do hope is that the children will get that lovely feeling, my little boy is counting down to his first six week holiday from school, and for months has been wanting to know how much longer?! This morning he welcomed me warmly when he woke up, with a big kiss and a lovely hug that only he knows how to deliver - he announced to us that he was really looking forward to school today, and he wished he could go there right now (it was 7am) I asked him why, and he told me because he has so much fun there.
I am so glad he is enjoying school, but I do wish he had discovered it wasn't that bad 6 months ago, instead of waiting till the week before he breaks up for summer!
Monday, 12 July 2010
Cor Blimey!
Well should really attempt a blog as it has been a while I guess!
Things are a changing again, work (pants!) is changing, new systems, expectations of great things, reality probable redundancy - phew what an escape! Will be my chance to get off my fat arse and do something less boring instead! Admin sucks!
Me - I am changing, getting very slightly more laid back, have decided that as there is another baby on the way I may as well give up on the show house ideal, and relax in my family home with my quiet frankly delicious little family. Also bump is pushing through now, clothes are no longer fitting, and my legs have begun to swell to enormous widths during the day. I have always had podgy legs, but my goodness these are a sight to behold - elephants would be keen to see the wonder of these!
Add the insect bites (is there anything about the summer that should make me happy?!) and you have horrific looking legs - they really are horrid, and are happiest elevated and covered so as not to alarm the children and the dog.
I am desperately trying to widen my entertainment, too long have I sat and watched american comedies which I have seen several times before. Its all part of my anxiety and trying new things, I am such an idiot - I am scared of wasting time on rubbish tv! I would rather commit to an old favourite episode of Friends or Frasier than explore new territory! Goodness only knows what I will be like when I am old! Sat in front of an ancient DVD player while my Great Grandchildren shy away from the strange old lady that is sitting dribbling and watching odd tv.
I have so far started watching Police Interceptors - on recomendation by a friend, I very rarely venture onto something that is completely new to me! I have also attempted Psychoville which was repeated on UKGold or Dave or whatever its called these days - I watched the entire series over 2 nights, which is kind of old behaviour in that I crammed it in, but it was a new programme so kudos to me for that! lol
This was kind of an easing into the real world a bit - it was a repeat but not something I had seen before!
I even watched a movie last night - all the way through. Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, I borrowed it from my parents about 6 months ago, and finally got courage up to watch it, and I am very glad I did. It was very good and very entertaining, and reminded me how much I adore Alan Rickman.
Ahhh Alan Rickman, probably top 5, nay top 3, possibly even number 1 of greatest actors of all time.
Right I am off to do some ankle rotations on order of the midwife and possibly even a relaxing bath.
Things are a changing again, work (pants!) is changing, new systems, expectations of great things, reality probable redundancy - phew what an escape! Will be my chance to get off my fat arse and do something less boring instead! Admin sucks!
Me - I am changing, getting very slightly more laid back, have decided that as there is another baby on the way I may as well give up on the show house ideal, and relax in my family home with my quiet frankly delicious little family. Also bump is pushing through now, clothes are no longer fitting, and my legs have begun to swell to enormous widths during the day. I have always had podgy legs, but my goodness these are a sight to behold - elephants would be keen to see the wonder of these!
Add the insect bites (is there anything about the summer that should make me happy?!) and you have horrific looking legs - they really are horrid, and are happiest elevated and covered so as not to alarm the children and the dog.
I am desperately trying to widen my entertainment, too long have I sat and watched american comedies which I have seen several times before. Its all part of my anxiety and trying new things, I am such an idiot - I am scared of wasting time on rubbish tv! I would rather commit to an old favourite episode of Friends or Frasier than explore new territory! Goodness only knows what I will be like when I am old! Sat in front of an ancient DVD player while my Great Grandchildren shy away from the strange old lady that is sitting dribbling and watching odd tv.
I have so far started watching Police Interceptors - on recomendation by a friend, I very rarely venture onto something that is completely new to me! I have also attempted Psychoville which was repeated on UKGold or Dave or whatever its called these days - I watched the entire series over 2 nights, which is kind of old behaviour in that I crammed it in, but it was a new programme so kudos to me for that! lol
This was kind of an easing into the real world a bit - it was a repeat but not something I had seen before!
I even watched a movie last night - all the way through. Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, I borrowed it from my parents about 6 months ago, and finally got courage up to watch it, and I am very glad I did. It was very good and very entertaining, and reminded me how much I adore Alan Rickman.
Ahhh Alan Rickman, probably top 5, nay top 3, possibly even number 1 of greatest actors of all time.
Right I am off to do some ankle rotations on order of the midwife and possibly even a relaxing bath.
Sunday, 9 May 2010
Well that is one approach.....
I finally have a way out of work - well for a short time anyway. I am newly pregnant with my third baby!
It came as quite a surprise to me and the other half. But now the initial life changing shock has worn off, we are both excited about our new addition.
The children are quite excited, my son is excited and would like a boy as then he would get to share his bedroom, my daughter is excited and also would like a boy, as she has lots and lots of girl cousins, and I think she quite likes being the 'only girl' in our unit.
To be honest it was something I thought may happen sometime in the future, another baby - but as it happens its now, and I am really quite excited to meet the new little personality.
Morning sickness is not really something I am suffering with this time, the odd day I get 'the gags' and some evenings, but no real sickness.
I've just spent the best part of the morning having a lay-in to help with the tiredness that accompanies pregnancy. I then got up and made the masses pancakes for breakfast - well it is Sunday!
Its actually May now, but still wet and grey on the whole. Not something that bothers me too much - I'm not all that outdoorsy, so it really isn't a big deal to spend the day inside!
I suppose I can't write a blog at this particular moment in history without a mention of the hung parliament. I didn't vote Tory, and if there is any agreement between Tory and Lib Dem, it will be short lived and will mean in 12 months when it all goes terribly wrong that Labour will get in again. So maybe that is a good thing.....of course if the Lib Dems go with the Tories - we may be saying a firm goodbye to Nick Clegg, and without a doubt they will go on to dissappear into obscurity - I am fairly certain that most Lib Dems fall on the side of Labour rather than Tory.....
That is my view anyway.
Right I am off to do pregnant things like rest and look at baby things......
It came as quite a surprise to me and the other half. But now the initial life changing shock has worn off, we are both excited about our new addition.
The children are quite excited, my son is excited and would like a boy as then he would get to share his bedroom, my daughter is excited and also would like a boy, as she has lots and lots of girl cousins, and I think she quite likes being the 'only girl' in our unit.
To be honest it was something I thought may happen sometime in the future, another baby - but as it happens its now, and I am really quite excited to meet the new little personality.
Morning sickness is not really something I am suffering with this time, the odd day I get 'the gags' and some evenings, but no real sickness.
I've just spent the best part of the morning having a lay-in to help with the tiredness that accompanies pregnancy. I then got up and made the masses pancakes for breakfast - well it is Sunday!
Its actually May now, but still wet and grey on the whole. Not something that bothers me too much - I'm not all that outdoorsy, so it really isn't a big deal to spend the day inside!
I suppose I can't write a blog at this particular moment in history without a mention of the hung parliament. I didn't vote Tory, and if there is any agreement between Tory and Lib Dem, it will be short lived and will mean in 12 months when it all goes terribly wrong that Labour will get in again. So maybe that is a good thing.....of course if the Lib Dems go with the Tories - we may be saying a firm goodbye to Nick Clegg, and without a doubt they will go on to dissappear into obscurity - I am fairly certain that most Lib Dems fall on the side of Labour rather than Tory.....
That is my view anyway.
Right I am off to do pregnant things like rest and look at baby things......
Sunday, 21 February 2010
Another Wet Sunday!
We get a lot of those, and I really do enjoy them.
The children have their toys out, and are on the whole playing together, the tv is showing a selection of Tom and Jerry cartoons, and me and the other half are sitting at our laptops.
I think I may have the start of yet another chest infection, I had a week off work a couple of weeks ago with a severe chest infection, and its never really gone away.
Work - now there is a topic! I am at a stage in my job where I have started to dread going in, I sit and look at the clock from the minute I walk in the door, and I escape with a large smile on my face knowing that I don't have to see these people again for 12 hours,
I am contemplating lots of ways out of work, I buy lottery tickets regularly and keep a very close eye on new job options, but nothing has yet come to fruition.
It dawned on me today, that in 7 months I will be applying for my daughters place at school for next year. She will be starting school in approx 18 months, and she isn't even 3 yet, and hasn't started playgroup yet!
I am not ready for my baby to go to playgroup, and I am not ready for her to go to school, I am not ready to be a Mother of two children, I am enjoying being a Mother of 1 child and 1 toddler! I'm not ready to give up my buggy, and the nappies, and I wasn't ready to throw away the bottles and steriliser, the cot and the baby toys. But I guess the time is coming where I am being swept along, rather than choosing the next stage.
When I was a teenager I couldn't wait to be older so I could make my own choices, and yet the choices you make eventually leave you with none, and you are eventually left plodding along doing what is expected, choices being a far distant memory, and you are not really sure you ever had much of a say in the choices you made anyway.
The children have their toys out, and are on the whole playing together, the tv is showing a selection of Tom and Jerry cartoons, and me and the other half are sitting at our laptops.
I think I may have the start of yet another chest infection, I had a week off work a couple of weeks ago with a severe chest infection, and its never really gone away.
Work - now there is a topic! I am at a stage in my job where I have started to dread going in, I sit and look at the clock from the minute I walk in the door, and I escape with a large smile on my face knowing that I don't have to see these people again for 12 hours,
I am contemplating lots of ways out of work, I buy lottery tickets regularly and keep a very close eye on new job options, but nothing has yet come to fruition.
It dawned on me today, that in 7 months I will be applying for my daughters place at school for next year. She will be starting school in approx 18 months, and she isn't even 3 yet, and hasn't started playgroup yet!
I am not ready for my baby to go to playgroup, and I am not ready for her to go to school, I am not ready to be a Mother of two children, I am enjoying being a Mother of 1 child and 1 toddler! I'm not ready to give up my buggy, and the nappies, and I wasn't ready to throw away the bottles and steriliser, the cot and the baby toys. But I guess the time is coming where I am being swept along, rather than choosing the next stage.
When I was a teenager I couldn't wait to be older so I could make my own choices, and yet the choices you make eventually leave you with none, and you are eventually left plodding along doing what is expected, choices being a far distant memory, and you are not really sure you ever had much of a say in the choices you made anyway.
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